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User blog:Clockboxxer/Balrog vs TJ Combo Remastered
WOAHSTOPWAITKID.png|Clockworx Pre-Interlude Thrash: *Watching TV* Nok: *Walks in* Get up, Thrash. We got work to do. Thrash: Oooh, time for Gargos vs Shao Kahn? Nok: No. Thrash: Then the hell do you want? Nok: Remember Balrog vs TJ? Thrash: The one that the writer himself hosted without us? Yeh, what about it? Nok: He wants us to remaster it. Thrash: WHAT?! That's not our job! Nok: He's the boss. Sorry. He missed stuff in the analysis for both Balrog and TJ AND he wants to redo the fight as a whole. SO GET CRACKIN'! Thrash: Fine....asshole. Nok: I heard tha- Thrash: I noticed, dipshit! Nok: Ya wanna go right now?! Thrash: Yeah, I wanna go! As Thrash tackles Nok to the ground and a fight erupts over their silly dispute, Astral crashes through the booth on his motorcycle. Astral: Oh, boy. Interlude Nok: Fuck. Thrash: What? Hey, aren't we gonna discuss our fight? Nok: We did half of Balrog's prelude before the internet got fucked and everything past the pre-interlude was fucked. Thrash: .....So technically, we've already done this. Well, let's start. Again. Son of a bitch. Nok: Boxing. It requires, strength, skill and most of all, a drive to win. Thrash: This is doubly important when battling secret agents, ninjas, assassins, monsters and other things that sound more intimidating then a simple boxer. But somehow these two can handle themselves. Balrog, Street Fighter's money hungry boxing champ. Nok: And TJ Combo, the glory loving boxing champion of Killer Instinct. Thrash: He's Nok and they call me Thrash! Nok: And we're here to analyze their skills, abilities and lack of weaponry to find out who would win a DEATH BATTLE. Balrog Super Street Fighter IV Balrog Theme Nok: He's tough, he's greedy, he's downright sadistic. Of course, I'm talking about Balrog, the chief enforcer of evil crime syndicate Shadaloo. Thrash: Well, really, his name is Mike Bison or M. Bison. Nok: Please don't talk abo- Thrash: In Japan, M. Bison is Vega, Vega is Balrog and Balrog is Mike Bison AKA M. Bison. But Capcom doesn't wanna get sued by Tyson so their names were flip flopped. Anyway, how did this jacked 6"4 and 298 pound monster of a man get to be by M. Bison's side? Well, it all started with a professional boxing career. Nok: Ugh. Balrog grew up poor in a ghetto neighborhood. After putting some bullies in the hospital, Balrog took on boxing and found out that he was a total ace at it. He didn't just enjoy the sport. He cherished torturing his foes. Eventually, he rose from poverty and began his new career in boxing. Balrog was UNSTOPPABLE. Thrash: That's putting it lightly. The guy KOed anyone in his way. Brutally. Yeah, he had it all. Money, fame, chicks. But there was one problem. Balrog wasn't exactly the greatest sport. Nok: Balrog resorted to unfair tactics that weren't allowed in boxing. He was banned from boxing after he accidentally killed a man with a single headbutt. After this fallout, Balrog had been stripped of everything. So, desperate, he joined Shadaloo and rose up to chief enforcer, doing anything to get paid. Thrash: Makes sense. I mean, the guy KILLED a man with one headbutt! Nok: Balrog's fighting style relies on powerful strikes in quick succession. Being good at tanking damage, Balrog uses underhanded tactics to win the fight such as stomping on his foe's toe. Balrog's moveset includes dashing punches and uppercuts. His Dash Grand Blow is a powerful sweeping punch sure to knock opponents down. Thrash: His superarmored Screw Smash uppercut can barge through attacks like nothing! And his Charging Buffalo and Bursting Buffalo are devastating charging punches and uppercuts. His V-Reversal is a powerful combo breaking headbutt and his V-Trigger is Crazy Rush which allows him to chain the aforementioned Charging and Bursting Buffalo. Street Fighter V Balrog Theme Nok: And his V-Skill allows him to dodge through projectiles. But most impressive is his Critical Art, the Gigaton Blow. A massive dashing punch, it's sure to send opponents flying. Thrash: And last but not least are his Dirty and Crazy Buffalo attacks. Dirty Buffalo has him headbutt the opponent, step on their toe and finish it off with a big punch. And his Crazy Buffalo is 4 interchangeable punches with a 5th Turn Punch. Nok: Of course, with all his power, Balrog can do some pretty impressive things. Like the time he killed Dhalsim's elephant with a single Gigaton Blow. Elephants can withstand up to 5 tons of force, meaning Balrog can punch with more force than that. Thrash: Or when he survived Bison's 110 ton death explosion! For being the big brute that he is, he's taken down Chun Li, Vega, Dudley, FANG and even bested Necalli, Emissary of the Gods. But there's a catch. Nok: Despite his brutality and strength, Balrog is unintelligent and full of himself. His arrogance makes him do things like rush into fights without a strategy or choose to take hits instead of dodging them. Thrash: If he can dodge them, that is. He's slow and utilizes his upper body more than anything else. This is why characters like Ryu and Ken took him down with smarts and swiftness. Even if he did tie with Cammy that one time. But still, Balrog is a beast and he'll do anything for his fight money. TJ Combo Yo, Check This Out! Nok: There are two types of boxers. The ones that bask in glory and the ones that bask in disgrace and regret. Thrash: Ya see, Tyler-Johnson Garrett or TJ used to be the first type but transitioned into the second one. Nok: As a young child, TJ was poor and lived near the Texas Coast. Soon, he had found himself into boxing. After joining a junior league where he lost, he came back to the victor with only revenge on his mind. Thrash: By stuffing coins into his glove, he put the kid outta commission with just one punch. After breaking the kid's nose, he was kicked out of the league. Nok: Growing up from the experience, TJ had been spoiled just once by how it felt to win. Category:Blog posts